The time of year is upon us, tis the season for reconsideration and renewal. What are your stories of forgiveness — how have you overcome betrayal, did you receive an unexpected gift of financial absolution, were you able to rekindle a brutally severed relationship. Sometimes there is no path to forgiveness — and perhaps should not be.
What does forgiveness mean to you?
How have you used forgiveness in your life?
How does forgiveness serve you in creating a better world for you and your relations to live in?
“Forgiveness” as a term is actually inadequate in describing a very complex concept. Dr. Marmer (https://is.gd/c0CKoL) suggests that forgiveness actually implies three different things, each of which applies to distinct situations and produces diverse results.
The three types of forgiveness are:
Exoneration essentially means that the slate is completely wiped clean and the relationship is fully restored to its previous sense of innocence.
The offender either makes a partial apology or lessens their apology by suggesting that you are also partially to blame for their wrongdoing.
This is the lowest level of forgiveness and applies to situations in which the person who hurt you has never acknowledged any wrongdoing.
Each of these types of “forgiveness” are impacted by the situation you may find yourself in. Was it an innocent accident? Was there malice on the part of the other party that harmed you? How badly were you impacted by the “event”? Were there others there whom were also impacted by this hurtful event? Were there witnesses and what is your relationship to those people and how does forgiveness impact your relationship with them.